Sometimes we choose our chains….

….Particularly when they are chains that bind us to one another.

I’ve been exploring rest, and the notion of rest as that which gives energy, that which replenishes rather than taking away, that which is restorative.

Social media used to be a joy.

There was joy in reconnecting with old friends and finding new ones or building friendships and relationships with those you might be unlikely to cross paths with any other way.

In some ways, there is still all of that.

There are still many moments of joy for me across multiple platforms.

I am and will always be grateful for the relationships forged, strengthened, and nourished through social media.

But as with many things in life, I struggle with setting boundaries on social media, particularly at the point that I feel it turning from restorative and connecting to addictive and exhausting. When I am scattered in other areas of my life, I find myself drawn to the chaos of social media, ostensibly to make myself feel better, but more often than not, in a way that feeds my anxious tendencies.

I see this about myself. I know it.

I also know that the key will be unlearning, reminding myself that I existed as a whole person before social media, and that I will exist as a whole person if I choose to walk away from it.

I know that the key is intentionality, choosing freely, staying connected, even when it requires more effort.

I know my body will know when it is time to walk away. I know my heart will feel it.

It is up to me to ensure that my mind stays connected with the embodied knowledge I possess, if I am to avoid mindlessly scrolling down timelines until hours have disappeared.

This has not been easy for me. But it is getting easier.

I am feeling free and lighter.

I am choosing to be bound to community not through chains, but through networks of mutuality.

I am reminding myself when I open a social media app that scrolling is optional. I am showing grace to myself when I slip into old habits. I am shutting it down when I feel tired.

I am growing. We are growing, Friends.

We can choose our freedom, just as we choose our chains.

We can choose our joy; we can choose many forms of connection.

Most of all, we can choose to love ourselves and others in ways that run deep, that take time, that bring us back to what we feel in our bodies and know in our hearts.

And that can never be taken from us.